The World According to Keitho

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Color me abashed

Posted by keithosaunders on January 22, 2016

And we’re back.

Listen, if you are someone who buys and uses adult coloring books let me tell you something, you’re a moron. I mean, what are you doing with your life? GROW UP. If you colored past the age of 11 you were unmercifully ridiculed and I’ve got news for you, the statute of limitations has not lapsed.

Now put down that pastel crayola, walk over to the mirror and look at yourself. LOOK AT YOURSELF. You’re a shell of a person. Get a hold of yourself, man. There are better ways to relax than painstakingly trying to stay inside the lines of a picture of a Tonka truck.

Look, maybe you’re bored, your life is a meaningless, vapid shell. I’ll allow for that. Here are some suggestions on how to spend your free time more productively.

1) Play tennis

2) Go hiking

3) Put on a Coltrane record and expose yourself to some culture.

4) Take up masturbation

Any of these choices will make you a more productive member of society than coloring.


Keith Saunders's photo.
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3 Responses to “Color me abashed”

  1. verdun2 said

    Yeah, but what about my Crayola stock?
    v

  2. Look how intricate these patterns are! This is not relaxing!

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