Sapiosexual,sapioschmexual

Once again I am here to report on my continuing encounters with online dating.  Here in the Bay Area there are many phony baloney trends.  Some people are into ethical monogamy, which is basically cheating with a get-out-of-jail free card.  I’ve already touched on that wonderful institution, polyamory – Mormonism by another name.  The more girlfriends/boyfriends/wives/husbands, the merrier!

Today, however, I’m here to talk to you about another idiotic trend:  Sapiosexualality.  I would estimate that about one of every ten profiles I come across, the person identifies herself as a sapiosexual.

What is sapiosexuality, you ask?  Good question!  I had to look it up.

sa·pi·o·sex·u·al

ˌsāpēōˈsekSH(o͞o)əl/

adjective

1. 1.

   (of a person) finding intelligence sexually attractive or arousing.

   “I met a PhD student from Germany who told me that he was sapiosexual”

 

Please.  Don’t kid a kidder.  You and I both know that if we gathered 20 sapiosexuals in a room, brought in Albert Einstein (assuming we could reanimate him) and Leonardo DiCaprio, and asked the sapiosexuals to choose between the two for a sexcapade, 20 out of 20 are going with Leo.

Don’t give me this malarkey that it’s brains, not beef, that drives sexual appetites.  Identifying as a sapiosexual may make you appear to be a cutting edge hippy-dippy Bay Area player, but in the end you’re just another passive-aggressive, lightweight Californian.