Enough is enough. The TSA has made it clear to us that they will have their way with our bodies, whether it be by radiation exposure or excessive groping of genitalia. Let’s face it, the experience of air travel has long ceased to be anything approaching glamorous, let alone tolerable. Let’s exercise our last line of recourse and vote with our pocket books.
If enough of us refused to fly the airlines would feel compelled to offer incentives as a way of drawing us back. Number one on their priority would almost certainly be expunging the TSA from the airports and replacing them with private security.
Since that alone would not be enough to entice this jaded traveller to return I am offering my own list of incentives.
1) Elimination of charges for checking luggage.
2) Ability to fully refund my ticket up to 7 days prior to flying
3) A guarantee that when I purchase a ticket that I will have a seat waiting for me. This means that when I purchase my ticket I immediately have an assigned seat.
4) Price of in-air food decreased by 50%.
5) Two in-air drinks for the price of one.
6) In case of flight delays exceeding 30 minutes passengers receive a $50 voucher which can be used towards future flight purchase.
7) In case of delays upwards of 60 minutes passengers receive $80 in airport VIP lounge script and lunch with John Elway.
I’m negotiable on point 7.