The World According to Keitho

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Posts Tagged ‘pizza’

Shaken baby syndrome

Posted by keithosaunders on May 21, 2016

This afternoon I was playing a gig at Cheeseboard, a pizza joint in Berkeley.  In the middle of one of our songs the sound of a baby crying got my attention.  When I looked over I saw a mom gently shaking her baby back in forth in time to the music.  I’m sure she was doing it as a way of soothing him — I can remember doing the same to my children when they were infants.

But how do we know that babies like this?  Perhaps it bugs the shit out of them.  I know it would bother me if I was sad or anxious and someone randomly  began shaking me back and forth.  I’d be like, ‘what the fuck?’ 

I bet that the baby reacted well to being shook the first time –  ‘Hey I didn’t see *that* coming.  fun!’  

As the Cheesboard baby’s crying picked up in intensity I imagined a different response.  ‘What the hell are you doing, are you out of your mind?!  I’m sick of pizza, I hate this artsy, precious music, and it’s time for my damn nap.  GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!’

But no, his mom went on shaking and the baby went on crying.  Some parents have the sense to try something else while other’s stick with the tried and true.  And what do you suppose happens to these perpetually shaken babies?  What is the consequence?

They become Trump voters.



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